As a child, I never knew what gifts to pick for friends who invited me to their birthday parties. My mom always picked for me. She even bought the gifts herself. But she always made me wrap them.
The Socrates in me would always ask, “Why?” Bagging a gift is clearly more efficient. It takes a fraction of the time and you can reuse the bag. “So why wrap a gift?” My mom would say that wrapping is more thoughtful.
I would argue that wrapping doesn’t take much thinking. It’s 5 minutes spent covering something in colorful paper that is meant to be torn.
Later, I’d come to realize that those 5 minutes are what makes it thoughtful. Time is what buys a thoughtful gift, not money. The latter only buys you an expensive gift.
Every time I wrapped a gift clumsily, my mom would sit next to me and correct my technique. She was clearly better at wrapping. If she had time to choose and time to buy, she had time to wrap. “So why should I wrap?” My mom would say that, when possible, the thought should come from me, not her.
For a while, I gave up on giving thoughtful gifts. When I bought the occasional one, I’d give it in a standard gift bag. And then, someone gifted me a perfectly-wrapped copy of their favorite book, All the Light We Cannot See. The folds were meticulous, the taping was minimal. It was thoughtful.
My mom often said, “what you give is what you get.” It’s annoying to hear that when you’re wrapping nice gifts for someone who gave you a box of chocolates on your last birthday.
But there are also days when a stranger helps you out, expecting nothing in return. There are days when an old friend lends you a couch to crash on and a teacher stays overtime to give you an extra lesson. Those are the days you’re grateful for paying it forward.
So, whenever I wonder if I should spend an extra 5 minutes to wrap a gift, I ask myself:
What if everyone asked the same question and started giving their gifts in bags – or worse, naked? Would I rather live in a world deprived of wrapping paper?
And I bring out my scissors and tape and sheet of colorful paper and start folding.
Written by Aryan Bhasin